T.I.A.

THIS.IS.AFRICA.

Such has been the phrase of the week. If you’ve seen the film “Blood Diamond,” you know exactly what I am talking about. If you are unfamiliar with this term, it is a best-attempt description of the insane, but frequent, happenings characteristic of Africa. If not to justify, it is used at least to excuse.

It all began last Saturday…

After 4 weeks of going hard ministering to orphans and widows and visiting churches, we completed the first leg of our trip and were headed back to South Africa to regroup and recuperate. To kick things off, our ride to South Africa fell through. “Whatever, T.I.A.,” I thought. We then arranged for someone to take us to the border. The driver assured us that upon crossing, we would have our pick of rides to whatever destination. At the border, we were pleasantly surprised when we made it through in record 30 minute time (it usually takes about 3-4 hours to cross). Quite pleased with how quickly we crossed over, we foolishly thought the rest of our journey would be as pain-free.

Several hours later, we met a man who was willing to take us to Pretoria since he was already traveling in that direction. As we climbed into the back of his pick-up, the man assured us that we would be departing “very soon” as soon as he heard from “someone.”

Slight disclaimer: time is a relative concept in Africa. Africans also have an uncanny ability for being vague.

Here's an example:
Me: How much further until our destination?
Driver: It is just ovah’ there! (Translation: Relax, we have 8 more hours to go!)

Back to the story. 5 hours later, the engines fired up and we pulled out of the gas station. Shortly after, we began circling the highway. It didn’t take long for me to realize something was awry. We pulled over to the shoulder. Out of the bushes, 7 men jumped out and came running towards us. Panic set in. T-I-Freakin’-A. Especially so when I looked to my South African friend for some sort of explanation, only to see him jump and hit the ground running with luggage in tow. Ready to follow suit, I reached for my bags. It was only when I saw a woman carrying an infant child I realized we were out of danger. Even so, we wanted an explanation. As it turned out, the driver was transporting illegals from Zimbabwe. We had heard enough and decided to “bump that…” and walked to a 24 hour diner. After a few more hours of waiting (it was now 3AM), we secured a ride to Pretoria in the back of a small UHAUL like truck with no windows. We rode out the 6 hours in the back of a truck with 14 people plus luggage. This too, turned out to be a truck transporting illegals.

THIS.IS.AFRICA.